My second baby is now six weeks old and we have all been adjusting to another little person in the family. Turns out life with a newborn is very different second time around especially when you have a crazy 20 month old to contend with as well! It hasn’t been as hard as I had anticipated though, I had myself freaked out that I wasn’t going to manage especially when my husband went back to work and was also panicking that my first born would react badly. Having said that it’s not exactly a walk in the park either but second time around I have been less anxious, all the newborn stuff is still fresh to me so it wasn’t as overwhelming as when I brought my first baby home from hospital and felt like I didn’t have a clue what I was doing!
I’ve also learnt not to sweat the small stuff. With my first baby I had unwanted advice coming from every direction with everyone telling me what I should be doing with my baby and as I result I began to feel like people must have thought I wasn’t cut out for the job so it made me determined to prove them wrong by trying to keep on top of everything. I soon learnt not to let other people’s opinions annoy me, as long as my baby was healthy and happy that was all that mattered. Besides he was growing up so fast that I didn’t want to waste time stressing out about the little things. Now that I have two mini people to keep me busy I don’t even have time to think about the little things so as long as everyone is fed, relatively clean and happy I feel like that has been a productive day even if the house resembles some kind of disaster zone! It also helps that this time people decided that since my first baby is still in one piece after 20 months that I must have got the hang of the whole mothering thing so are keeping their opinions to themselves!
My son has also reacted quite well to his little sister arriving which is a huge relief. He had already started to throw the odd tantrum before she was born and I was worried in case the upheaval of another baby getting attention would make things worse but thankfully for the most part he is still the same happy, affectionate little man except for the odd meltdown when I accidentally give him the wrong water bottle or some other equally serious problem! I’ve learnt to pick my battles though so if giving him chocolate at 9am or letting him go play out the back in his pyjamas and wellies in the rain is what it takes to give me a few minutes peace to tend to the baby then that’s just what I have to do!
I was also worried that I wouldn’t be able to give my second baby the same attention that my first born got but thankfully my toddler is very good at playing independently so I have got plenty of new baby cuddles. Also so far she has been a very good, contended baby so even though I have had to set her down more than when I only had one baby she is happy just to sit and watch her big brothers antics!
So if anyone is considering having two babies close in age I say go for it! You will never have a minute to yourself again, just finding time to have a shower will be almost impossible, keeping everyone fed and clean will become a military operation and conversations with your other half will be limited to discussions about dirty nappies or how little sleep we each got that night but it will all be worth it when you look at the amazing little people you created and watch them growing up together.